Terrible Book Club

The inevitable has happened: we heeded the cries of friends and listeners and read a book from Stephanie Meyer's Twilight series.

Special thanks to Twitter user @laughterbynight for hooking …

Our Patron Lucek requested that we read You're Going to Mars! for an extra special birthday edition of a patron's choice episode. Happy birthday, Lucek! As for the book, well - it's a …

Our Patron Miri requested that we read the legendary German post-modernist play, Die Hamletmachine and also watch a film adaptation of it. You can watch us react in real-time to the film …

We read The 1776 Report - you know, that weird American history summary that the Trump Administration released on MLK Jr. Day.

What could possibly go …

You are about to enter the Courtroom of Judge Meatball Sub and Judge Veggie Delight with Egg. The authors are real. The stories are not. The rulings …

We have finally heeded the call of numerous listeners and read one of Onision's books. This week, we discuss his third book from 2018, Reaper's Creek.

Topline takeaways: (1) this work needs …

In the first two-book episode of TBC, Archangel Parisael and Archangel Christophatron sing to the angels and try the breath-tap method. Amidst the …

Chris Fenton promises a "deeply revealing memoir" with Feeding the Dragon, but is it actually just a glossy, dimensionless jerk-off session with a shoddy Chinese backdrop instead? You …

We review a religious text this week! Lured in by the promise of a faith focused on big-assed women and body positivity, we find ourselves deceived by a man who uses women as a prop to try …

Like a plane soaring to cruising altitude in calm, sunny weather, Ninth House really set itself up for success in the first 70% of the book. It had lifelike characters, believable dialogue …

Happy New Year, listeners! In our first episode of Season 6, we determine that the true villain of bad writing may in fact be capitalism. Thanks to our friend Liz for recommending this to …

It's winter holiday time, so you all get a little gift from TBC.

Please enjoy this special Patron's Choice presentation of Terrible Film Club, where …

Hounded: The Iron Druid Chronicles, Book One is basically an Irish shonen anime.

Does the world need more male power fantasies devoid of consequences? No.

Does the world need more …

We've somehow been doing this for 100 episodes!

We read a sci-fi horror short story with poor pacing and character development, then move on to the inaugural Terrible Book Club Awards! …

Today we read a book that was recommended to us on Twitter over a year ago by Twitter user @GeneCurl. The Demon Pig is a clever, fun fantasy novel …

Chris found When TRUMPets Ring: The Battle - A True Story by Gregory Hetzer out in the wild on the C-SPAM thread on the SomethingAwful forums. Yes, I …

Happy U.S. Election Day! We all need some extra entertainment today, so we're airing this episode a week early.

We read a book of feminist cartoons and learn that humor has shifted a lot …

Late Bloomer is a perfectly good gay billionaire erotic romance novel (if that's the sort of thing you're looking for). It even has realistic …

Come along with us, listeners, to the fabled land of The Dunks where all value is now held in gallons of iced coffee, and all inter-state sports travel requires the hiring of Mad Max …

Paris and Chris return to the very horny Midlands with our woods guide, TJ! He helped us out when we read Stone of Tears, and he was so invaluable that we put a Rada-Han on him and forced …

This week we discuss another book that Chris found out in the real world at a local book store: a self-help book that's based on the 1939 film The …

Our patron Signe bought this book thinking it was written by an author she actually liked - Mark Edwards. Unfortunately, The Woman You Marry was written by Mark A. Edwards.

We're pretty …

Chris's book scouting in the real world yielded today's book, which we didn't totally dislike! It may not be for us, but there's some good writing in here and great character portraits. …

Our favorite Antiques Freaks, D & Ken, are back! In ghost form!

We decide that space IS ghosts, have a ghost horse gobble-neighing contest, and try to figure out how the hell this short …

Listener Martin Ford recommended this to us and we had to read it because it seemed so absurd. How could a book like this win a literary award? A …

This week it's 1985 and we're two children in an off-brand "Plot - It - Yourself" horror story. Chris wants to die as quickly as possible while Paris chooses life. Paris's microphone is …

Chris asked a bookstore employee to take him to the worst book they had seen lately, so we ended up getting BLASTED by this BOOKSHOT from James Patterson. 

Audio quality warning: Chris …

We learn to control everyone with this ONE WEIRD TRICK! Chris tries to hypnotize Paris into loving bad books. This material was so short and devoid …

We begin this episode by arguing about tigers and lions and eventually make our way to discussing the mechanics of human and tiger-man mating.

This …

Paris and Chris have had a long evening of crafting for the previous episode. They then try to work their way through Maze while in an exhausted, sleep-deprived state beginning after …

T'was the week before Christmas and all through the house, could be heard Paris and Chris shrieking, and not from a mouse.

This psychological thriller didn't so much thrill us as annoy and infuriate us. Diary entries read like screenplays, the writing is bland overall, …

In this edition of Microwave Cooking for One in Space, we ascend with our arsenal of 200 microwaves. We're gonna' cook Mars just right.

We read the original Moon People four years ago in …

When D & Ken listened to 30 seconds of our podcast and told us we were good, we immediately invited them onto our show as guests and then got …

Neither of us over at TBC are into "bizarro" fiction, but today we discover that this corner of literature exists and it sure lives up to its moniker. 

The weirdest and creepiest thing …

It's October, so this episode is the first in our series of spooky books in honor of the season.

After a long day of stocking up on fun size candy …

Another week, another screenplay disguised as a book. This one is a real Russian nesting doll of poor choices.

Thanks to Bob from Books, Beards, …

Someone cast Meteor on Chris's computer and this episode and the associated bonus Patreon content was almost lost.

Luckily, his back-up Lifestream kicked in and saved the files, but not …

GET YOUR PINKLE JINXXXXXXED!!!

This book came to our attention through an anonymous recommendation. Thank you, anonymous person, and we hope you enjoy this episode.

We're roasting ourselves again! We decided that it was time to review past missteps and things we were wrong about on air. We try to keep this show conversational and familiar, but the …

This time, we’re roasting ourselves! We decided that it was time to review past missteps and things we were wrong about on air. We try to keep this show conversational and familiar, but the …

The editor for this series posted about how bad the writing was in a Facebook group called Men Failing at Erotica. We happened to see the post and another TBC episode was born. Thanks to …

After seeing #puppetgate trending on Twitter, Chris and Paris dive into the script of the play All in a Row with our friend Adam.

Adam is a Board Certified Behavior Analyst with a MA in …

This time, we figured we’d try to help you understand and - more importantly - laugh with us at The Mueller Report. It's a 448 page U.S. government report with over 1,000 footnotes that few …

This week we learn how to (not) defend ourselves with objects through a book infamous for its imagery! Thanks to our friend Chris H. for posting some images from this book on Facebook, …

April Fool's!

Tomorrow you'll get your regularly scheduled TBC episode, but for today we're switching episodes with The Short Stories of Augie …

Somehow we're reading another Christian-leaning, dog related book with strange authorship. We really don't know how this happened again. Thanks to longtime friend of the show Elisa for …

This week, we're simultaneously in both the years 1953 and 1692. Luckily our friends D & Ken from the Antiques Freaks podcast have arrived to …

We received an anonymous recommendation to read this book. It is easily one of the most concentrated forms of delirium ever put to text.

• The Sunny …

This time, we’re dead and trying to figure out just what to do with these incorporeal forms of ours. Luckily, a copy of David Straume’s Beginner’s Guide to Sex in the Afterlife was waiting …

Ah, cats - who doesn't love a good cat video or cat meme? The world is full of cat-themed things, so it's only natural that a cat fantasy series …

A guy who reviews cartoons and is really invested in creating a cartoon series himself wrote a children's chapter book in the universe that he's been creating for a few years. There's …

No real content warnings this week except for one off-hand misogynistic statement by a single character! There IS a weird scene that could be …

Fritz Leiber may have coined the term "sword and sorcery" and he may have written some legendary stories, but this book is not to be counted among those same accomplishments.

Don't be fooled! Darrel Day didn't write this - or even edit it, apparently - he just put it on the internet for his friend, Terry Bandemer. Which is …

Happy Halloween! Enjoy this episode one day early as a treat from the Terrible Book Club.

Crabs - The Human Sacrifice was suggested by reddit user dickdastardly and voted on by listeners as …

This book feels like the author created a massive dartboard where each section was a completely random idea or topic, put on a blindfold, threw …

This time, we read an X-Files novel sanctioned by Chris Carter and it was just as pulpy as we expected. If you miss Mulder, Scully, and their crazy …

Since this book takes place 200 years in the past, we figured we needed some experts on old stuff! D & Ken from Antiques Freaks join us this week …

Cops that are dogs and dogs that are cops co-star in this sex-less Christian romance with an unreasonably long title! This story tries to cash in on the cross section of people who are …

Ah, yes - remember being in love so fiercely that you disobeyed your parents, ran naked through the forest all evening, worshiped nature gods, and …

If you're tired of plots and characters, this episode was made just for you! This time we read a book of poetry loosely held together by western gender norms, redundancy, and poor word …

Have you ever really liked a band? Have you ever liked a band so much that you thought you found evidence in their lyrics that their frontman had lived previous lives and a demon helped you …

Burning witches, evil dads and uncles, more foreshadowing than one could ever need, the most obviously evil necklace of all time, and - of course - …

Can we interest you in some crawfish? Perhaps other types of seafood? Some jazz? How about some gay erotica? If you answered "yes" to any or all of these questions, you'll love this 30 page …

This time we read a short, double feature book with two fantasy/sci-fi novellas that were packaged together for seemingly no apparent reason:

• Lands …

In this in-between books episode, it's game time!

Chris read a guide/miniature self-help book called Chakra Crystals by Kate Tomas about meditation and magical rocks and Paris tries to …

This time on Terrible Book Club, we read a book that wasn't truly terrible! Wow! It happened!  

We also have special guest Laura Filippi on to …

Episode 28 is all about ghosts, mediums, and how Long Island seems to be some kind of breeding ground for psychics. If you're a skeptic of supernatural phenomenon or have ever wondered …

You Suck! was given to Paris as a Secret Santa gift (thanks, Coty!) The book has some issues, but ultimately it's a crass and somewhat amusing parody …

Birds. Watches. Tits. These are things that old men from the 1800s love to talk about. Or, at least famous ornithologist John James Audubon liked to …

Episode 24 tackles the anti-vaccination phenomenon. Melanie's Marvelous Measles was written by an anti-vaxxer author so parents could easily …

For November, we read a self-help book to help us become smart hos!

G.L. Lambert has created the ultimate guide to being a sociopathic fraud winner! …

Our first sequel. Sexy nuns. Demon dicks. Naked horseback riding. All this and more can be found in Terry Goodkind's Stone of Tears, the second book in the Sword of Truth series.

In Episode …

Episode 21 is brought to you by vampires, pistols, werewolves, sub-machine guns, boobs, automatic rifles, orcs, elves in trailer parks, RPGs, hulking …

Chris & Paris learn that a gluten-free themed murder mystery book exists. Naturally, they couldn't resist reading such a bizarrely …

This book has evangelical Christianity, drugged out rock stars, squeaky villains, and FREEDOM. Have you ever wanted to be converted to a religion by a crazy child fan who has written to you …

When a book opens with a Nazi coming through a time portal in a library in the year 2000, it's easy to assume that the book will be pretty bad. Somehow, though, Aeon Legion: Labyrinth jumps …

David Duchovny is a female, teenage cow with a surprisingly good grasp on technology. In Holy Cow, he leads us on a journey through factory farming, …

Dive with us into the cesspool of Boston Harbor where mermaids make out! Explore an aquarium imagined by someone who was there one time!