This book feels like the author created a massive dartboard where each section was a completely random idea or topic, put on a blindfold, threw darts, and chose what she would put in the book based on where those darts landed.

If any of you are or know someone who is an expert on Old Norse, Old English, or Middle English, Paris wants to talk to you because she has some linguistic bones to pick with this book.

This is a haphazard tale of time travel, chefs, vikings, angels, vampires, demons, ISIS (yes, the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria), scents, awkward relationships, sex, lots of food, and menus of that food. Despite having SO MANY ELEMENTS, this story doesn't have a whole lot of action that inspires suspense or wonder - readers may die from the drama famine.

Nothing in that above list is a joke - it's all in there, like the vague and numerous ingredients of those 90s Prego commercials.